I Changed My Mind.

I've decided that I WILL use the Prometrium again this cycle.
My period arrived less than 48 hours after the last Prometrium pill at just 12.5 dpo. That tells me that I may still need some progesterone supplementation. I'm going to try to go with Lucas to the Dr. on Thurs. so I can get "first-hand" information, ask questions, and sneak in a couple questions about myself too.

I'm on CD 2 today and already feeling "over" this 2 week wait, although I promised myself that I'd relax a bit this cycle and try to enjoy the process a little more.
I know I'm young, but I feel that with every "missed" cycle, I'm losing time.
I realize that God knows the desires of my heart, but I wish that our timeframes were in sync with each other.
This is Month 8, and Cycle 9 of TTC!

*Dear Lord Jesus, I pray today and ask that You guide our Dr's mind with Your wisdom, that You heal mine and Lucas' bodies, and I ask for peace in knowing that we will conceive again in Your time. In Your Name, I pray, AMEN*


I hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving and that you will all have a blessed HOLIDAY SEASON with the people you love!

Negativo

Well, I finally got up the courage to take a home pregnancy test this afternoon.
BIG FAT NEGATIVE! at 12 days past ovulation

I've been cramping mildly for the past 1 1/2 days, it feels like my period is on it's way.
I'll stop the Prometrium immediately and I'm sure I'll start bleeding by Thursday.

Lucas and I talked again about our "plan of action"
He made an appt to talk with his Dr next Thurs about what could possibly be the cause of our difficulties.
Next Cycle:
-I'll continue B6
-No OPKs (ovulation predictor kits)
-No "planned" sex
-No Prometrium
-I'll give BBT (taking my temp) a shot again just so that I know when I O'd and if my LP is long enough.

So to sum it up, we will try to put the spice back into it.

A New Day.

-TODAY is a new day.
I realized yesterday, that I don't like the momma I've become (yelling, bribing, bargaining, threatening) ALL DAY LONG, it's gotta stop!
I realized yesterday, that I'm not "enjoying"this parenting thing.
I realized yesterday, that if I don't love all aspects of mothering, my kids will not appreciate their momma.
I realized yesterday that I need to put more effort into nourishing my kids minds.

I realized yesterday, that I need to take this one moment, one minute, one hour, one day, at a time until all my bad habits have gone out the window.
Then I can peek in and say "WOW, what an awesome momma!"

ok, I gotta go, my baby girl is awake and calling for me, time to be a REAL MOMMA!

Just Knock Me Out!

Yesterday, I started feeling sick with a dry/scratchy throat, sinus drainage, and a little congestion. It hit me full blown at 12:30 am this morning. It is now 7:15 am, that means I got 3 hours of sleep last night and I've been awake for almost 7 hours. My whole head is congested, my throat is killing me, and I'm exhausted. To make matters worse, I'm home alone with the kids today till at least 1ish.
I just want this over with already. I am such a baby when it comes to having a stuffy nose.


HELP!

Partners in Crime!

I seriously don't know what I'd do without my TTC/Pregnant friends online. It gets to the point in the TTC journey where no one in real life wants to hear about it anymore. Whereas the online friends (DOOPS girls- you know who you are) could talk about it till the end of time. They will support all your decisions, sometimes they'll be a make-shift Dr, they'll cry and laugh with you, and they'll beg to see a picture of your latest pee-stick so they can manipulate the pic until everyone's seeing double lines.

I truly value their support: their opinions and advice, their way of clarifying a situation, their heartfelt thoughts and prayers, their constant shoulders for crying on, and their hands for picking me back up.

I love yall!

And for my Partners in Crime, -M-, -A-, and -J-, I love yall even more!!!

Adventures on Prometrium

My side effects so far:

Let's see how many of these I can complain about?

(Abdominal cramping, back pain, bloating- just stick a pin in me, breast tenderness or pain, chest pain- happened last night when I breathed in deeply, constipation, coughing- might be from a dry throat and sinus drainage though, depression, diarrhea- yep, dizziness, emotional instability- omg yes, poor Lucas, fatigue, headache, hot flashes, irritability- is this the same as bitchiness ?, joint pain, muscle pain, nausea, night sweats, swelling of hands and feet, upper respiratory infection, urinary problems, vaginal discharge- uh yah, I expected this one (What goes in, must come out), vaginal dryness- how about irritation (sure is itchy down there), viral infection-damn it, are you serious, I do feel a cold coming on AGAIN, vomiting, worry )

So there you have it. This drug is a fun trip!

I'm 5 dpo (days past ovulation) today. As recommended by Dr. Cool, I'll start peeing on a stick in 5 more days (Sunday)! He wants me to test earlier so that a) I can call him about our plan of action if I'm pregnant and b) because I have to stop the meds within a reasonable amount of time if I'm not pregnant.

At 5dpo, the blastocyst is making it's way to the end of the fallopian tube and into the uterine cavity, where it will begin implantation into the endometrial lining soon.

So, I gotta question for all the psychics out there:
Am I pregnant?
What day will I get my +++ pregnancy test?

p.s.- Swami Sydni said November was my month and since my cycles are shorter, I got 2 chances for November.

That's all for now, maybe more a little later.

Do my boobs look bigger?

I seem to remember reading a long time ago (probably in a pregnancy book) that part of the reason women's boobs grow during pregnancy is because of the hormones...???

So, since I'm supplementing my hormone progesterone, does that mean my boobs will grow? Oh God, I hope so!

You see, I have itty bitty titties. Like smaller than 32 A! Well, the right one is almost 32 A and the left is a bit smaller. When my milk came in after giving birth to my daughter, I woke up one morning thinking "Damn, I look like P. Anderson"! In all actuality, they were more like a 32B. Not to my surprise, they slowly started shrinking back down once my body got used to the breastfeeding schedule. "Damn it, I look like P. Perabo"!

I mean seriously, my tits and my ass are no where near proportioned.

Now don't get me wrong, my awesome husband loves 'em just the way they are.
And my kids certainly didn't complain... they were perfect bottles!

So tonight, I'm praying to the Hormone/Prometrium/Booby gods!!!

Speaking of Prometrium, my first side effect to speak of is:
diarrhea (many women get constipated from progesterone, but I'm the opposite)!
YIPEE! There's nothing better than Acid Shit! *rolling eyes*

New Obsession, I suck at cooking, and MOTY

Alright, I can already see that this blog thing is gonna be a new obsession. What is this, #3 for today! Holy crap Char- slow it down, do you really have that much to say??? So, this blog is exactly what I said it would be, a place where I write about the random thoughts in my head.

Why is it that the harder I try to cook something extremely yummy and healthy, the more horrible it turns out? Tonight I tried to make pineapple-ginger meatballs (I know, sounds good huh?), it was a gooey, nasty, mushy pile of yuckiness. The taste was ok, but the consistency was inedible. I suck at cooking!!!

So, I get MOTY (Mother of the Year) tonight because I'm letting my kids eat ice cream for supper. I just don't have the energy to whip up something else for them to eat when I tried so hard on the "meatballs".

That's a weird looking vagina...

I chose this awesome orchid background because supposedly, the curvy shapes of an orchid are similar to .......well, vaginas.

No, I do not have an obsession with vaginas! But I do LOVE orchids.

I thought the orchid/vagina theme just kind of fit.

Tales from the Hoo-Ha

So, I mentioned before about the previous non-existant blog being about TTC (trying to conceive) and such. I'll include some of that here too.

A little history:
I had a miscarriage in Aug. '08. We lost our baby (who I fondly call Snow Pea) at 7 weeks. We found out the day I had the miscarriage that my progesterone and HCG levels were very low. The Dr. gave me a prescription for Prometrium to raise the progesterone level. However, I only got to take one pill before we lost the baby.
I've been walking around for the past 3 months with the the pill bottle in my purse. I don't know why, maybe as a physical reminder of the baby we lost, who knows?
Anyways, I went to my new Dr. a week ago to try and figure out what's going on with my crazy cycles (periods). My cycles have become shorter in length, the luteal phase (second half of cycle) has become too short to support a pregnancy, and my bleeding has become irregular and shorter as well. I know what you're thinking, why is she complaining about shorter periods??? Because I think that my uterine lining is not thickening enough for a baby to implant. So, new doc (who I'll call Dr. Cool) says "what would you like to do"? I mentioned the progesterone pills that were still in my purse and he says "ok, we can give that a shot, it should help to build up your lining and lengthen the luteal phase". YES!- the doc agreed with me. However, he wasn't too sure about how the pills should be used in women who are TTC. You see, Prometrium is commonly prescribed to pre-menopausal women, and women who have unusually long cycles. He suggested that I take 2 pills a day starting a day or two after I ovulate (yes, I know when I ovulate- it's a silly obsession).
After doing lots of research, I decided that I'll try taking just 1 pill a day (200mg) at night from 1-2 days after O (ovulation) to 13-14dpo (days past ovulation)- vaginally. Yes, you heard me right- VAGINALLY.

Thus the title "Tales from the HooHa", tonight will be day one of shoving a little pill up my you know what in hopes that it'll help a little baby snuggle in a little easier (hoping we caught one this month- another story for another time) .

Yay for you, you get to join me in my Adventures on Prometrium! Taking it vaginally should reduce some of the nasty side-effects (Abdominal cramping, back pain, bloating, breast tenderness or pain, chest pain, constipation, coughing, depression, diarrhea, dizziness, emotional instability, fatigue, headache, hot flashes, irritability, joint pain, muscle pain, nausea, night sweats, swelling of hands and feet, upper respiratory infection, urinary problems, vaginal discharge, vaginal dryness, viral infection, vomiting, worry ) and increase it's absorption. Sounds like fun, huh? Wish ME and MY UTERUS Good Luck!

It all began months ago... and ended then too.

I started a blog back in April '08 to journal my way through trying to conceive and pregnancy. After just a couple posts, I became discouraged with my lack of words to say. So the blog ended there. Now, months later, I'm starting up again. I NEED an outlet, a place for memories, and somewhere where I can let my hair down and tell it like it is!
Hopefully this will be a place where I can write (or rather type) the random thoughts that pop into my head at random/inappropriate times.
I have always loved writing, but haven't done so for many many many years. I can't tell you how many times I've thought about writing and never got around to it or put it off so long that I forgot my genius (I mean humble) thoughts.
Bear with me, I tend to be straightforward, sarcastic, and sometimes silly.